A Gaggle of Book Reviews

Carpool Diem is a new book by Nancy Star. Star has taken the theme of soccer moms and the actual sport of soccer and taken it to another level, creating characters that will make you laugh, because it’s all just so true. If you’ve spent any time around youth soccer, you must take a look at this book, it was written for you!

Our main character in Carpool Diem is Annie, a high powered executive who travels for work, as does her husband Tim, who is also very busy and traveling a lot for work. Their nanny Hildy takes care of their 12 year old daughter Charlotte, and Annie is starting to realize that Hildy knows far more about what Charlotte is doing and more about everything in general. It’s right around the time that this realization is setting in that Annie is fired, and turns into a stay-at-home-mom slash consultant. Once she’s home, Annie realizes even more how out of it she’s been, when she meets her “new” neighbor, a woman who has lived in the house next door for two years.

Soon Annie has taken charge of their household as only someone who has focused on reorganization can do, with her work hard/play hard credo. After a career of doing and getting only the best, Annie is trying to put that philosophy to work for her at-home life, starting with getting Charlotte onto the Power, the super-duper-A+ travel soccer team. Coach Winslow West is the coach of the Power, and his over-the-top email missives to the team are interspersed in Carpool Diem with chapters focused on Annie, Tim, and Charlotte’s storyline. Winslow’s emails are a sight to behold, filled with new rules and exclamation points!

Nancy Star has really written perfect characters for Carpool Diem. I’ve been the parent who hopes for rain to cancel soccer practice, and reading about Winslow West’s “you only leave the field if lightning has touched the ground” rule made me laugh out loud; there are plenty of other lines just as funny, too. Annie pushes herself, Tim, and Charlotte hard, wanting everyone to do their best and be “winners”. At some points in the story, readers may want to slap Annie, but we all know she has to calm down at some point. Right? Star has also gotten the fun nuances of twelve-year-old girls, too: the perfect mix of sullen, giggly, and needy.

The characters are socca-riffic, and they pull along a great storyline. I was surprised at which underdogs I started to root for – frequently it was characters I had disliked at first. The plot really sweeps you through the book, it’ll keep you from putting it down, reading it in your warm car while your kids play soccer in 28 degree weather.

If you’re an at-home mom who has ever watched the uber-successful moms, and wished they could spend a day in the trenches, Carpool Diem is a must read! If you’ve ever wanted to thwack the soccer coach who goes way overboard about team rules, parent attendance (or absence), and being a socca-starter, you shouldn’t miss Carpool Diem. Between the over-the-top characters and the storyline that always has a surprise, Carpool Diem is a book you should definitely pick up. Put it in your socca-bag!

This book was received from the publisher for review

WIN IT!!!

Leave a comment on this entry, and you could win a copy of The Woman Who Is Always Tan And Has a Flat Stomach: And Other Annoying People! Winner will be selected at 12 midnight March 3.  Don’t miss our interview with Lisa and Lauren!

Lauren Anderson and Lisa Perry have written the ultimate book to help imperfect parents feel normal – The Woman Who Is Always Tan And Has a Flat Stomach: And Other Annoying People. Have you ever felt like the only woman who doesn’t knit? Have you ever wanted to thwack your husband on the head for obsessive video camera use? Have you ever felt intimidated by the homes that are decorated for every holiday? Have you ever needed an antidote to the Martha Stewart factor in suburbia? Don’t worry – The Woman Who Is Always Tan And Has a Flat Stomach: And Other Annoying People is here for you!

But wait, there’s more! Lisa Perry and Lauren Anderson have taken written snapshots of those people, the ones that make you feel inadequate and irate, all at once. Realizing that you aren’t alone in those feelings is one of the first steps toward acceptance of your imperfect self. Laughing at caricatures of “perfect” people, and even caricatures of ourselves can help you get through the dark, dull winter days. I could see myself on both sides – as the caricatured person and as the imperfect person, and I laughed equally hard at both.

Each annoying person is given their own short (2-5 page) chapter in which we see the imperfect author vs the annoying person. The caricatures are beautifully written – they stay within the bounds of humor, but with a bit of an edge. The book includes chapters about:

• The Husband Who Either Asks for Inane Instructions or Else Gives Inane Instructions
• The Woman Who Has Her Christmas Cards, Shopping, and Decorating Done Before Thanksgiving
• The Perfect Soccer Mom Who Knows All the International Rules of Soccer
• The Wine Connoisseur Woman Whose Wine Rests More than I Do
• The Woman Who Cleans Out the Refrigerator Every Thursday Whether It Smells or Not
• The Infomercial Couple Who Start Every Sentence with “But Wait! There’s More!”
• The Husband Who Doesn’t Notice When His Wife Redecorates the Living and Dining Rooms

There’s nothing quite like a book that contemplates polygamy as a solution for a stressful holiday season! (One wife to make the cookies, one for shopping, one for writing the cards, one for decorating…) I can understand why Lauren Allison and Lisa Perry self-published The Woman Who Is Always Tan in 2005, it needed to be out in the world. In their introduction they thank their “perfect” friends, “Without you, our self-esteem would never have plummeted and we never would have written about our many inadequacies.” These women have a flair for bringing humor to parenting and self-esteem issues, and an ability to help the reader laugh at herself and rejoice in her imperfect self.

This book was so much fun, and if laughter counts as exercise, I giggled away several pounds! Anyone who needs a laugh should pick up a copy of The Woman Who Is Always Tan And Has a Flat Stomach: And Other Annoying People. Carry it with you so it can perk you up on days when you’re down. It’s a nice, thin book that’s easy to carry, with short chapters that can perk you up in moments. Be sure to buy copies of The Woman Who Is Always Tan for your other mom friends – they will thank you!  Don’t miss our interview with Lisa and Lauren!

Don’t forget to comment on this entry, and try to win a copy of The Woman Who Is Always Tan! Leave your comment before March 3 for an opportunity to win!

This book was received from the publisher for review

Lucky reader Katrina won a copy of The Minivan Years. 

I have 3 daughters under age 10, and everyone has playdates, activities, and errands. I know I spend far more time in my minivan than I ever expected! I love being home with my daughters, but there are a few moments here and there that aren’t fun. I was interested in having the opportunity to review The Minivan Years: Celebrating the Hectic Joys of Motherhood, to read another mom’s experiences parenting young children. A minivan can be a small, shrill place for even the loveliest daughters, dogs, snacks, and sand toys!

The Minivan Years: Celebrating the Hectic Joys of Motherhood is a collection of essays by Olivia Bruner which brings attention to the good parts of life with young and busy children. While pointing out the positives, Bruner uses Christian messages as well as anecdotes from her daily life and the lives of her friends and family. You may recognize Bruner’s name from her earlier book Playstation Nation, which she co-authored with her husband, Kurt Bruner. Their names may also be familiar because of their close work with Focus on the Family and Dr. Dobson.

If you are a Christian mom who is feeling frazzled, this is the book for you! Whether you are stressed by the number of things you have to do each bedtime, or having to reheat dinner before eating it, or even simply the amount of time you are stuck in the car, there are simple ideas on how to make you and your family happier. It’s great to see simple, insightful ideas; Bruner knows that giving overwhelmed parents complex ideas to reduce stress would only cause more stress! Each chapter highlights a certain area of life that can be challenging, and then gives tips to help lower your stress level and increase family harmony. Bruner intersperses her tips for keeping a positive attitude during The Minivan Years with quotes from Scriptures and lessons from the Bible. Don’t think because Bruner is quoting Scripture and discussing her faith throughout the chapters, that she has a holier-than-thou attitude; she is funny and self-deprecating as she talks about her own parenting mishaps. You can’t help but laugh with her when her two year old goes outside and knocks on the neighbor’s door dressed only in bubbles!

If you are not Christian, this book is not likely to be a good fit. The religious message is very strongly tied with the parenting tips, so it would be difficult to “bleep” over the Christian aspects. Depending on your comfort level with Christian theology, you may wish to look through it, as Bruner has some wonderful ideas that anyone can use.

Some of the nuggets from The Minivan Years I really enjoyed were:

• “Relax! We must learn to worry less and trust our instincts more.” (p. 97)
• High/Low: “Begin the habit of going around the dinner table and asking each person to take turns sharing his or her high and low for that day.” (p. 28)
• Play together: “When I play a round of Go Fish with Shaun, he learns to enjoy me as a person, not merely obey me as a parent and authority figure.” (p. 55)
• Money Management: “It’s never too early to begin modeling and teaching your children about handling money. Why not start when they are young by setting up a give, save, and spend allowance box?” (p. 64)

If you are a devout Christian with young kids, I highly recommend picking up The Minivan Years. It will give you some ideas about picking your battles and realize that “if a perfect parent like God encounters mishaps, I suppose you and I are in good company.” (p. 15) Olivia Bruner has a lovely sense of humor, and she intertwines real examples of parenting mishaps along with guidance from the Bible and changes her family made so their lives would become easier.

If you have a different belief structure, I recommend looking at The Minivan Years at the library or a bookstore prior to purchasing it. Depending on your comfort level, it may or may not be a book that could give you a some new ideas.

This book was received from the publisher for review

Thank you to everyone who commented!

I’ve been reading a lot. I’ve been reading good books, too. Just not books I could whole-heartedly recommend. There were little things that bothered me, or even big things. I have a huge stack of books I am planning to read, and not enough time to do so – winter seems filled with Things To Do.

But then I found it – The Book I Couldn’t Put Down! Perfection. There’s a sequel out, too – and I’m so glad I read it just before the sequel came out, that way I don’t have to wait too long for more. This is one Adult Lit book that doesn’t fit into neat categories, either.

Confessions of Super Mom, by Melanie Lynne Hauser is a wonderful book. Truly. The title is disarming – it sounds like a book you would want to avoid, because it would be another silly book about a mom who does it all, and irritates the reader while she does it.

NOPE! Instead, this is the story of a divorced woman who has a “Horrible Swiffering Accident”, where she tries to clean a stubborn stain in the bathroom while forgetting to turn on the exhaust fan. When her teens come home and wake her up, she finds that she now has super-powers! her hand is like a scrubby, and her finger shoots cleaning liquid!

Super Mom (aka Birdie Lee) has a geeky teenage son who helps her create a superhero outfit, she has the geeky love interest who helps out, and even the evil plot in her town to foil. It is a mix between a superhero comic, chick lit, a mystery, and a good laugh. I’m sure I’m not the only one waiting impatiently to read the sequel – Super Mom Saves the World!

I finally finished Dirty Sugar Cookies: Culinary Observations, Questionable Taste, by Ayun Halliday. I used it as a car book, because I owned it (and therefore didn’t have to worry about finishing it before it became overdue) and it is perfect for short bursts of reading, as the chapters are short and hold their own – no need to hold a plot in your mind from one chapter to another.

Why yes, i do realize that everyone else in the world reviewed this book quite some time ago. However, if you happen to be looking around for a more recent review, you’ve come to the right place!

I should also preface this review by saying that I have read all of Ayun Halliday’s books and loved them all. Sure, there were parts where her opinion and mine differ, but her style is humorous without being overly giddy, and she drops in social activism without creating a guilt trip.

Dirty Sugar Cookies is an autobiography through food – Ayun Halliday matures through the book from a picky eater to one who will eat anything. She is nostalgic about foods from her childhood, and talks about the various friends and family who influenced her as she began to experiment with cooking and food. Ayun shares wonderful recipes for brownies, post-coital pancakes, chipotle chili, and veggie burgers from her vegan/vegetarian stage. The recipes themselves are hilarious, “whale on it for 2 minutes” about a pudding – or for the chili “customize it to suit any palate: carnivorous, white meat only, pescetarian, vegetarian, cannibalistic … the chipotle ensures that modifications of the flesh won’t lead to any culinary ruination.”

You know what? With entries like that, it’s no wonder I preferred to read the book than watch my daughters’ soccer practices! This book definitely gets a thumbs up from me. I’m going to copy down a few recipes to test out, then hand it off to a friend. Given how much her friends influenced her cooking, I bet Ayun would approve.

My oldest daughter turns 9 tomorrow – four short years from 13. In 9 years I will have 3 teenaged girls in the house. Yikes. I watch my friends who have teenagers, and wonder how they can keep themselves, their teens, and their other children happy and sane all at once. It looks so overwhelming from the outside. But then, when you are pregnant with your first child, watching someone with 2 or more children looks overwhelming, too. I know we all grow into our roles, but I worry about peer influence and what types of teens my daughters will become.

I was nervous about reading Joseph Nowinski’s The Identity Trap: Saving Our Teens from Themselves, because quite honestly I just want to stick my head in the sand and believe my girls will stay little forever. However, I signed up for this MotherTalk tour so I could learn about ways to help my girls so they don’t need to be saved from themselves.

The Identity Trap is not a quick or easy read. It isn’t a dull textbook either, though. Rather, it is a mixture of case studies of various teens and notes to help parents with teens in those situations (plus a great index!). Nowinski offers guidelines and FAQs to help the parent of a teen through various situations, to help guide teens away from a negative identity and towards a more constructive expression of emotions.

Some of the case studies are extreme and disturbing – a teen is upset about his family dissolving and his dog dying, and he ends up being charged with murder. I’m sure the most shocking stories are included so parents can see a worst case scenario. However, I found it jarring to read extreme (to me) case studies and then little boxes that say “Heads up!” with a bit of advice. Further, the advice and recommendations seemed rather like common sense:

“Heads up! When it comes to punishment, less is more!”
“Heads up! Talk about yourself!”

“Heads up! Learn about what’s going on in your child’s life…”

I plan to keep this book on my shelf and share it with friends who actually have teens. Right now, it seemed to be giving me information I already had – keep talking with your kids, know what they are doing, parent gently, pick your battles, and allow some rebellion as long as no one gets hurt.

I really like that Nowinski tells parents not to assume that their child is mentally ill – teens do things that can look like mental illness when they are actually totally age appropriate. I also like his attitude within the book, and I am sure that in a few years I’ll need a reality check about what behavior is OK and what behavior needs help. Having a wonderful index is also a huge plus – it is easy to look up certain behaviors and learn more.

I would definitely recommend reading or skimming The Identity Trap if you have teens, and picking out the information that is most useful for your family. You may not need the whole book, but by checking out the table of contents and the index, you’ll be able to get the content you need quickly.

This book was sent to me by the publisher for review.

Piece of Work is the newest novel by Laura Zigman – funny, heartwarming, and real. If you haven’t already read Animal Husbandry, Dating Big Bird, and Her, go do so now. Buy all 4 novels – they look wonderful together in a square! You can also check out Laura Zigman’s website for some clever and insightful writing, too. I realize it is no longer Breast Cancer Awareness Month, but it’s definitely worth checking out her moving and informative illustrated stories about her own experience with breast cancer.

If you’ve had it up to here with the “Mommy Wars”, your reading list should include Piece of Work – it’s a funny, biting, and heartfelt story about a family, finances, fun, and parenting. In a world where folks are either in the stay-at-home-mom (SAHM) camp, the work-outside-the-home (WOHM) camp, or the absolutely Politically Correct camp, there needs to be a story about how many moms really feel about the pull between work and family.

Piece of Work is a novel about a family, first and foremost. At the very beginning of the book, Julia is an at-home mom who loves being home with her son Leo. She adores spending time with him, and even when he’s being a tyrant (as 3 year olds are wont to do), she remembers her previous celebrity bosses as a publicist, and reminds herself that he’s the best boss she’s had. Julia is happy to be a SAHM, and is not feeling any longings for returning to work. Leo is a sweet, train-obsessed preschooler, who any mom can understand – heck, my scooter is blue, so it’s named Thomas. He isn’t played up as a brilliant child with perfect quips, he feels like a real 3 year old. Peter is the dad, working as a management consultant re-organizing companies, but like many dads not managing his home life. Everyone is happy with the status quo until Peter gets fired (or he’s the only person in the office to be laid off).<!–break–>

Five months into her husband’s unemployment, Julia has her credit card declined at The Container Store, and decides they must have income from somewhere. Her husband is either not succeeding in finding a job or not trying hard enough, but Julia can’t find it within herself to keep pestering him about how the job search is going (a difficult situation, and one I understand after having a husband unemployed for a year). So, with no income in 5 months, and none in the forseeable future, Julia returns to the world of Celebrity publicity. Of course, after 4 years out of the loop, she’s not quite as marketable, so she has taken a few steps down and is working with “has-beens” at a less prestigious PR company.

I have written about my issues with many novels in which stay-at-home moms who return to the workplace or become involved in something that is as time-consuming as a job. Most of them talk about how good they feel when they can be around other adults without talking about children, and how the new job fulfilled them in a way parenting never did. One wonderful exceptions is Julie Kenner, whose books are filled with children who are realistic, and whose mothers miss them when they are apart (2 books reviewed here). Piece of Work is amazing in this regard – I’ve never seen my feelings about needing to do outside work, and the feelings of many of my friends, expressed so eloquently. Actually, I’ve never seen these thoughts about transitioning to work outside the home ever expressed in a mainstream book. One wonderful quote that captures Julia’s feelings:

She knew a lot of women would disagree with her and she knew she wasn’t supposed to think this, but there wasn’t anything on her desk that was half as interesting to Julia as Leo was.

As Piece of Work continues, Julia finds her home is being incredibly well-run by her husband, who is even cooking elaborate dinners. Her heartache over returning to work is made even more difficult by her perception that her husband is better at being a SAHM than she was. When she has to travel, she is dealing with celebrities who are far fussier than little kids, plus they can be verbally abusive in ways children could never manage (er, unless we’re talking about middle school girls…). Even when she is alone in her room, she is thinking of her son, who they’ve nicknamed “Scooby Doo” or just “The Scoob”. Even as her anxiety over her relationship with her son becomes all-consuming, her relationship with her husband is also strained. The very real emotions tied into finding income for the family and managing the home are so well expressed.

Piece of Work shows a side of working mothers that is rarely shown in books. You usually see working moms who are comfortable about daycare/working, or occasionally have a few qualms that are quickly dismissed. In the “Mommy Wars”, mothers who work outside the home and mothers who stay at home are pitted against eachother. In real life, this is less accurate, as each person and family has different needs. There are rarely novels brave enough to show that no choice is perfect, and that sometimes you don’t have a choice, it’s made for you. I am exceedingly grateful that I was given the opportunity to read and review Piece of Work. I sniffled, I giggled, and I could relate. Many thanks to Laura Zigman for writing such a wonderful book. To the rest of you – go read it already!